How to plan a baby shower, step by step

How to plan a baby shower in 10 steps

This is the order that saves you redoing things. For themes, decorations and food ideas, see the baby shower ideas hub. For the games step, see baby shower games and the ready-made baby shower trivia.

1. Talk to the parent-to-be. Ask whether they want a shower at all, how big, and whether it should be a surprise. Many prefer to know, so they can rest beforehand and invite the right people.
2. Agree the guest list. Get names and contact details from the parents, and ask whether partners, men and children are invited. The size of the list decides the venue and the budget.
3. Pick a date and time. Choose a weekend morning or afternoon that suits the parent-to-be and the key guests. Check it against family birthdays and long weekends.
4. Set a budget and who pays. Decide whether the host covers it, a few friends split it, or family chips in, before anyone starts buying.
5. Book the place. A home, a backyard, a park picnic area, a cafe's private room or a function room. Book early if you need a venue.
6. Send invitations. Include the date, time, address, RSVP date, any theme and the registry link. A QR code on printed invitations makes the link easy to open.
7. Plan the food and drinks. Finger food for a morning or afternoon tea, with something special for the parent-to-be to drink and dishes labelled for pregnancy.
8. Choose games and activities. Pick a few that suit the crowd, including one quiet keepsake activity.
9. Assign helpers. Name someone for the food, someone for games and someone to write down who gave which gift, so the parents can send thank-yous.
10. Shop and set up. Buy decorations, prizes and supplies in the last week, then set up the morning of the shower with your helpers.

Baby shower planning timeline

Count back from the shower date. If the shower is small or at home, you can compress the early steps.

When to have a baby shower

No authority sets a date, but many people choose the final trimester. The Sleep Store says showers are usually in the last trimester, often the last few weeks.

Plan earlier if the parent-to-be is expecting twins, has been told to rest, or simply wants it done before the last weeks get uncomfortable. Ask them, and their partner if they have one, rather than following a rule.

Weekend mornings or afternoons are the usual choice. An afternoon lets the parent-to-be leave when they are tired.

Who hosts and who pays

A close friend usually hosts, but a sister, cousin, grandmother-to-be, mother-in-law or godparent often does, and some parents host their own, especially for a second baby. The old idea that family should not host is relaxed now.

In the 2018 Finder survey, of the parents who had a baby shower, 27% paid for it themselves, 45% split the cost with family and 28% had family and friends pay for all of it.

If several friends are co-hosting, agree who pays for what before the shopping starts, and keep receipts.

Who to invite

Baby Bunting describes the guest list as people of any and all genders who care for the growing family, so a co-ed shower is fine. If the partner is coming, invite a few of their friends too so they are not the only one of their group there.

Family and friends who live too far away can join by video for the games and gift opening, or have a separate virtual baby shower.

Invitations

Send invitations about a month ahead, and earlier if many guests need to travel. Online invitations are fine and make RSVPs easy to track; printed ones suit older relatives.

Every invitation needs the parent-to-be's name, the date, start and finish time, the address, an RSVP date and contact, and the registry link. Add the theme or dress code if there is one, and say whether children are welcome.

A short wording that covers it: "Please join us for a baby shower for Sam, Sunday 14 March, 2pm to 5pm, at 12 River Street. RSVP to Jo by 1 March. Sam's gift list and wishing well are at the link below." Use the QR code generator to put the link on a printed invitation.

Planning a baby shower at work

• Check the colleague actually wants one, and how big. Some people would rather keep work and baby separate.
• Clear it with their manager and follow any workplace rules on functions, food and collections.
• Keep it short: a lunchtime morning tea in a meeting room, with finger food and no alcohol.
• One light game at most, or none. A card everyone signs and the gift are what people remember.
• Invite remote and part-time staff, and include them by video if they cannot be there.
• Make the collection optional and private. Never chase people for money. If your employer is paying, ask payroll.
• A shared gift works well here: put in a small optional amount each through one link, then buy something from the parents' list.

Baby shower budget and costs

A 2018 Finder survey of 2,005 Australian parents found baby showers cost $672 on average, excluding gifts. New South Wales was highest at $795 and South Australia second at $761. Nationally, Australians spent about $107 million a year on baby showers. No newer national survey was found, so expect higher prices now.

Where the money goes, and how to spend less:

• Venue: free at home or in a park; a cafe room or hall costs more.
• Food: a shared plate, where close friends each bring a dish, keeps the cost down.
• Decorations: one focal point, such as a balloon garland over the cake table, rather than a little of everything.
• Prizes and favours: optional. Small home baking or a few prizes for the games is enough.
• Gifts: separate from the party budget.

Help guests with gifts

Ask the parents to set up their registry for the baby shower before the invitations go out, so the link is on every invitation. If they are not sure what to add, start from the baby registry checklist.

For bigger items or the first months at home, a cash fund helps. The baby shower wishing well guide covers how to set one up and word it. Guests choosing their own present can use baby shower gift ideas. Guests asking how much to spend can check how much to give for a baby shower.